Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Facebook: It's a Love/Hate Relationship

I have been on Facebook for years now.

There are times when I absolutely love Facebook! I see a tagged photo of me when I was 15 with acne (which I still have), someone drops me a line that they are thinking of me, or I get a funny video that makes my day.

There are times when I absolutely despise Facebook! I tire of the same old thing, seeing repeated posts/rants and I feel as if this is becoming obsolete.

I have struggled with deleting my account (again), but then I have seen people delete theirs too many times. They delete, then eventually cave and re-open, only to do it all over again. I have known some to have had at least 5 profiles. It's probably a better idea to exhibit some self control. I don't want everyone to think I am losing my mind ;)

I do know some delete their profiles for a time, which I am totally fine with :) Some have goals to meet or have personal reasons to fast from their Facebook account.

It is truly a love/hate relationship.

Here are some of my hates:

I have tried to go through my friends' list and ask myself if I really know each and every person. Then I tried to narrow down whether I have had a personal connection with each one. I trim it down even more when I ask if we have communicated within the last year or two. I have managed to get it down to at least the low 200's.

The hard part when "deleting" your friends is they find out and are offended! Facebook is so impersonal, but yet we take it very personal when someone has deleted us. We assume we have made them mad and are hurt by the deletion. It makes for an uncomfortable re-connection or chance meeting. People delete each other for various reasons, it's not good to assume the worst. Unless you know you were deleted by someone due to an argument, I would put it out of your mind and not worry about it; if they are truly someone who cares for you, they might end up contacting you another way.

You get the obligatory friend request. You remember this person when you were young. You accept their request and find you have nothing in common. You have tried to talk to them and it's awkward. Well...ok then...

It gets old when you see incessant arguments and political fights that seem to engulf all of us at one time or another. It gets ridiculous when you feel as if you cannot post anything that means something to you without fear you will be berated by someone who sees things differently than you. I mean, it's your page, right? Aren't you supposed to be able to put whatever you want on your page? Unfortunately, that's not the case. If you have allowed someone to be your friend, you are allowing their beliefs and worldview to be published on your page. They have the right to say something if they want to. That becomes difficult and you soon realize that your friends and family share a completely different set of perspectives and views.

I have two little guys at home and I had to delete some friends and hide others because the photos they were posting were very offensive. My boys walk by my computer all the time and I would not want them to see something inappropriate! I understand people have a right to post what they want.... just like I have a right to delete what I want!

5 million selfies is not really necessary, you know?! Sure, you're cute and all, but I'd rather see a post with substance than another picture!

I see someone post they are going through a hard time. I respond, because they are on my friends' list for a reason! No response. I mean, even a comment like, "I'm good now! I spoke to the person I wanted to speak to in the first place!" Hello! Drives me nuts!!

Spies. You know what I'm talking about. The people that are friends with you just to see what you are doing wrong. Then they click their judgmental tongues and shake their head at your profile. I found a few of those.. even found out one person signs into an account of a friend.... all so she can spy!! She of course, does not have an account.

I know each and every person has Facebook for a different reason. Some have millions of friends and are hardly on their account, others are on it often and use it as a tool to keep communication between friends and family. I would be of the latter. I live 2,000 miles away from my childhood home and family. I have a million cousins and it's easy for me to see how everyone is doing on one place, rather than trying to contact everyone.

So here are my loves:

I get to see pictures of my family and friends. I haven't been back to Utah very much and I love to see pictures of my nieces, nephew, parents and siblings. I love it when my Aunt posts pictures of my Grandma chillin' with her and smiling for the camera. Even in her frail health, she told Cathy to tell us she got a black eye from fighting a nurse at the hospital. I get a kick out of all the pictures I see and am amazed at how unbelievably old we are getting.

Prayer requests touch my heart. When I get one, I try and pray right then and there. When I request one, I get teary-eyed at the caring responses.

I love to see Christians all over the cyber-world! I feel encouraged to read their blogs, hear how things are going and laugh at some of their witty humor. It means alot when I read a story that I can relate to, especially if it's about motherhood. It's good to be challenged to walk with God at all times.

Funny videos... I just can't get enough of them. I have to incorporate humor into my world or I will crack! I even played the song never ending story whilst doing the laundry because I got so sick of it! I was starting to get in a bad mood... so I played that video and it cheered my right up.

Births and deaths are announced on Facebook, sometimes even sooner than you would hear from loved ones. It's sweet to see the newborn pictures :) I even found out about Chuck Smith before I heard it anywhere else.

I am able to reconcile and/or catch up with people from my past. There is one person in particular that I am so happy to have found. We both understood where we went wrong and all is forgotten. I love that. Unfortunately, you might run into some unforgiving people... so this also could be placed under the hate part as well.

So, I guess I will personally have to weigh the pros and the cons to having a Facebook account. For now, I think the pros seem much sweeter than the cons, so I'm staying :)

Unless it starts to get all big brother-y on me, then I'm gone!

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